My heart was racing. I was smart enough to understand where things were going before they got there. Itâs important to be optimistic, but itâs just as important to be realistic. When you realize that your loved one is in love withÂ someone else, you see that the life you thought you'd have is no longer possible. You donât want a different life. Reality is different from our expectations, and most of the time that doesn't really bother us. If you donât confirm your beliefs then your beliefs must be wrong and therefore must be changed. But you canât. Lifeâs greatest tragedies can be lifeâs greatest gifts -- only if we are wise enough to learn from them. Deep love quotes to warm your heart. I didnât know what to think. I may have understood how things were going, but I didn't want to watch. I wanted to be with her, to create a life together. I didn't know if I should keep my hands inside or outside of my pockets. You donât want to change. YOUÂ have just changed. “When you love someone, you love the whole person, just as he or she is, and not as you would like them to be.”– Leo Tolstoy. Seeing the person you love fall in love with someone else can destroy you. I may not be in the right position to act like this because there was never an “us.”. But you'll know you're a different person than you were an hour ago. Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. When You Get A Love That You Don’t Deserve, To The One Who Didn’t Choose Me And Made Me Choose Myself, 8 Things I Wish Someone Had Told Me When I Was Diagnosed With Herpes, 6 Reasons Why I (And You) Need to Move On From That Failed Relationship, 220 Romantic Love Quotes for Her Because She Deserves to Feel Loved, I Want You To Grab My Hand When I Try To Walk Away. Who am I to get mad at you for not loving me back, for loving someone else? Then you do your best to figure out how to cope with it. Itâs funny how things never really turn out the way you thought they would. Then there are other times -- when our anticipation takes root and grows over months or years of waiting -- when real life pales in comparison to our fantasies. Not all of your hopes and dreams are going to come true, and when one of them collapses in front of your eyes, it hurts more than you could possibly imagine. I wish I could tell you which part that is, but I havenât yet been able to pin it down. “True love is eternal, infinite, and always like itself. Learn more about working with Thought Catalog. We expect more than we're likely to get. But if this is the only way for me to be able to see you smile every day, then it’s okay. It's necessary that weÂ understand the statistical chances of one thing happening versus another. You could have loved me, and I could’ve been her. For More Of His Thoughts And Ramblings, Follow Paul Hudson On Twitter, Facebook, And Instagram. We barely notice the difference between our expectations and reality, and we live our lives as if none of it mattered. You now have a partially blank slate. Then you do your best to figure out how to cope with it. You learn to steer your thoughts away from your ex, andÂ you discoverÂ that you have more time for otherÂ areas of your life. It truly is painful to see the one you love, love someone else. When the unexpected happens, it's usually not an issue. I believed she would love me for the rest of herÂ life, as I will love her for the rest of mine. Thatâs the issue with expectations: We usually overshoot them. But if this is the only way for me to be able to see you smile every day, then it’s okay. Unfortunately, Iâve come to learn that sometimes -- no matter how aware you are that things may not work out -- there is no such thing as sufficient mental preparation. Our beliefs define us and determine our future. But that wasn't -- isn't -- the case. The heart knows a hundred thousand ways to speak.”– Rumi. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. I wanted to start a family.Â I wanted -- and was ready -- to be the man, partner and lover that she had always wanted. I couldnât spend another second talking to her, because I knew I was about to break down. Itâs about what this person means to you. You just know that youâre now different. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. Loving Someone Sayings and Quotes. 205. It's about the place he or sheÂ has in your life as well as your heart. You get the opportunity to rewrite and redefine the person you are. 206. The more youÂ accept that there is always a chance that things wonât go the way that you think they will, the less likely you are to be caught off-guard when that happens. 204. When you realize that your loved one is in love with someone else, you see that the life you thought you'd have is no longer possible. 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